Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Change...

Is inevitable in our lives.  Whether we embrace it or fight it is up to us.

I've decided to embrace the changes in my life and thought I might share where I've been in the last year and a half.  For the most part, time has been good to me and I'm enjoying life.

My husband has dementia and I'm learning how to live with it.  Please don't be sad...it's a new way of life.  I keep educating myself, almost daily, on this disease and am able to deal with the challenges it brings.  I can't imagine how it is for him.  I do know my Montessori training has helped tremendously in day to day life.  When we have good days, we enjoy them and when the days are bad, we get through them.  I am going with the idea he understands everything I do and say.  Who knows how true this is. I do know most people do not want to be around this illness as it can be uncomfortable.  Please, what ever you do....please, treat a person with dementia as you would any other.  We don't know what's going on in the mind.

When I'm happy he's happy...


My granddaughters are now 16 and 12.  Where did those years go?  They are kind and loving and I have the good fortune to see them 3 days a week, as they need to be picked up from school.  The 16 year old is in no hurry to get her license...lucky me;)

Both are sassy, creative, smart and fun...


Being a full-time care giver does not mean life ends.  One just finds new ways to feel useful and needed.  I have chosen to start a small business finishing the work of other stitchers. "Finely Finished" has allowed me to be creative, inspired and needed while being where I need to be, at home.

From time to time I will be posting pictures of those finishes as well as life!  Also, I will be playing around with the colors and lay out of this blog.  Remember, I'm never quite happy with it.  Feel free to add your comments, I want you to be able to see and read the posts.

Finely Finished's work..


Now that's a little update on me...what have you been up to?

13 comments:

gracie said...

Many years ago I worked in a nursing care facility and spent many hours with The special people there. I most enjoyed the days with them.... unlike many of the other residents, they do not judge and for the most part truly are content as they can be. I understand how your days are and will be. I do hope you find time for you, your creative side and this blog. Keep us updated on what you are doing and I send hugs to you and your dear husband. I do believe they understand more than they can say. Hugs are important.

edie said...

Welcome back, I've been missing you. The girls are gorgeous, and they have the most wonderful grandparents in the universe! Warm wishes to you and Jim, my friend, and, again, so happy to see you back. Hey, how's Annie? Are you positive about the girls' ages? Weren't they just toddlers yesterday!!! Mega cyber hugs to you, and, remember, all the way to the moon! Oh, your finishing work is beautiful.

Kate said...

Hi - and Merry Christmas to you and those you love. My husband, too, has dementia. I'm not a full-time care giver. He is still independent and driving. But I know there is more coming. We are using doTerra essential oils with him (as well as his meds), and I think we are seeing results. I don't know if you are open to such alternatives, but it might be something to explore. I also read an article regarding organic coconut oil and its benefits with regard to Alzheimer's. There are days when I am really frustrated, and days that are really much better. I know I have to embrace(!) and learn to live through this process. It's helpful to read of someone else's journey, and I wanted to thank you for sharing it. Kate.

Terri said...

I live with and care for my mom who has dementia also, but very mild so far. She cannot drive, but is able to stay by herself during the day.

Good luck to you! And, it's great to see you blogging again!

valerie said...

It's good to hear from you. I am so sorry to hear about your husband's dementia but it's wonderful that you have the approach you do to this disease. My father also has dementia and it's difficult but I wish my mom took more your approach. I had seen Finely Finished on facebook and didn't realize it was you! I hope to send some things your way in the new year once I've done some stash organizing. Happy Holidays to you and yours.

Carol said...

Hi Joy--I know what a toll dementia takes on a family. My father just passed away six weeks ago after a four year battle with Lewy Body Dementia. My mom cared for him at home as long as she could, but eventually had to place him in a dementia care home. I wish you all the best--it sounds like you have an amazingly positive outlook on this whole new way of life. Remember to take care of yourself, too--don't get lost in the process.

Best of luck in your finishing business--I know there are many stitchers who will welcome your talented finishing skills!

Beth said...

What an inspirational post Joy. You truly live up to your name.

marly said...

Wishing you a new year filled with smiles and love. Your situation has become so common with our family and friends, and your approach is the best. The finishing is perfection!

Margaret said...

Your granddaughters are beautiful! And not being in a hurry to get one's license is a good thing in more ways than one! I hope your finishing business takes off. Good luck with that. I also hope you and Barb go to more concerts together. :D

I'm sorry to hear about your husband's dementia. Such a devastating thing. You are inspiring in your attitude.

Anonymous said...

So good to see a post from you my friend. I have not been on blogger too much ( and can't even remember my sign in info at the moment) but knew you hadn't posted for awhile. Anyway, your approach to dealing with your husband is wonderful. Not too long ago we watched a documentary called "Alive Inside"...it really made me think....
Love your finishing so much and as soon as the post office is not a mad house, I will get some more things off to you, my pile is growing.
Love you!
Andrea (deepfriedcupcake)

Vonna, The Twisted Stitcher said...

You are a strong woman and God will see you through this! Your grand-daughters are gorgeous ;) and cuties for sure! You have a fine business going and people need you both for your skill in finishing, in your friendship and in your care for them. Merry Christmas Joy!

BitsAndPieces said...

Joy, so happy you are back to blogging.
I have missed you! You are handling your
husband's dementia in such a
positive way. May you have more happy
days than difficult days in the new year.
Wishing you a wonderful Christmas...know
your granddaughters will share
in making it extra special.

Merry Christmas!
Sandy

Sharon said...

Beautiful post Joy, wishing you much peace as you navigate the days ahead. Love your finishing work. Your granddaughters are lovely! Happy New Year!